I did the pee test. Its negative. Its ok, I'll try again in 1 or 2 menses cycles time. Meanwhile, I'll heal the pain with patience and being thankful for all the blessings I have this life now.
Thank you for cheering me on in your heart. Dont lose hope if your obstacles seem challenging, Coz, one fine day you will leap across... Just be patient.
Couldnt sleep last night, woke up alert very early today, needed to pee. Feeling hot flushes and sore boobs with a mild headache on the right side of my head. Surfed the internet forum and read that papaya should be avoided during 2ww. This info freaks me out because I ate some papaya couple of days ago.. 'keep calm , keep calm'. Im telling myself that if its critical information, my doctor would have told me to avoid it.
2 more days to testing...
I got a positive! Ya right, a positive for urinary tract infection. Started antibiotics last evening and is feeling much better when I use the loo now, otherwise it felt like a crab pinched my peehole at the end of each pee attempt.
First of all, I hardly ever get uti. May be once in a few years? I should have peed again shortly after being cathetered during Embryo Transfer. If I did, I wonder if it would havd made a difference. I asked my RE if uti during the 2ww might affect chances for a bfp. He said it wouldnt affect a weeee bit. I just have to believe him.
I think I might skip poas (pee on a stick) this time. The last few cycles, my mind really got screwed up badly by the false positives (probably residual effect of the pregnyl jabs administered during the 2ww support). During the last cycle ivf#8, I did a digital hpt at my mom's house and it turned positive, it wrote 'pregnant' on the stick. You can guess the rest.. I told everyone at mom's place and was happy as a lark, but only for 1 day. On the day of hcg blood test and it turned out bfn. I did another hcg blood test and the hcg dropped further to near zilch. Darn pregnyl shots. It was so so hard and embarrassing to have to break the news to everyone who witnessed my happy dance the other day while holding the positive hcg stick. I felt like an idiot.
Really, so i think it might be wiser to lay off from poas especially since I'm jabbing myself with pregnyl this round too, on top of inserting cyclogest into my vjayjay twice daily and popping progynova.
This waiting ... this 2ww... is excruciating. I've been on the ivf wagon for way too looong. Please let this time be a bfp and baby in arms 9 months later. Pouring lots of baby dust on myself........ :)
It is a beautiful morning today. Life is beautiful because it is a gift. Health is a gift and so is life. Live each day fully, even when you are in a stage of limbo like the 2ww. Thats my motto today.
