Living

Its time to take stock of my overeating. i am going to write down what i eat from yesterday onwards to help keep track and be in control.

Friday 24/10/08
For breakfast @ Delifrance
- half a chicken baquette
- half a bowl of mushroom soup
- a cup of camomile tea

For lunch @ Kuriya Japanese set consist of
- hot plate beef and tofu.
- 1 bowl of rice
- 1 bowl of miso soup
- 1 chawamushi
- 2 pieces of tempura
- a slice of orange

For dinner @ foodcourt
- chicken ipoh hor fun

Pills:
Utrogestron vaginally x 2 time a day
Duphaston x 2 times a day
Folic
Baby Aspirin
Vitamin C
Vitamin E
Fish Oil

Its time for my 2 pekingese dogs to be groomed, sending them to the groomer's instead of doing it myself this time. Dont want to be exerting myself in a forward bend position for extended duration.

My daughter's potty training is coming along quite successfully, she is able to indicate her desire to pee in the potty now. :)

As for me, I am doing ok. Just feeling really chubby from all the stress eating lately. In fact, i have put on 2.5kgs (5 pounds) over a short 1.5 months. Need to watch my intake.. my plan will be to monitor very closely my food intake over the next week and modify the unhealthy part and try to improvise it a healthier, less glutton-driven diet.

beta doubling time

My 2nd blood test result is 611. My doubling time is 34hours. My progesterone level is 550 or 17.5. My beta doubling time is faster than the average doubling time.
I feel very consoled and assured now.

Here is a link that helps calculate how many heartbeats has your child taken so far.
From the link, my 20 days old embryo's heart will start beating in 2 days time.
http://www.ehd.org/pregnancy-heartbeat-calculator.php

I am sitting at Delifrance cafe's computer terminal at kkivf right now as I am typing this. Went for my beta hcg blood test and progesterone test this morning. I should know if my beta is doubling nicely or not by 2pm later today. KK hospital is one place that you can see many preggies around, I look at these women as very fortunate people... how successful they are as a woman to be able to carry that big tummy and how their chubbiness is so acceptable. I hope I will be blessed with a growing belly and a healthy pregnancy. It will be fun to be rolly polly and to walk like a duckie again.

I feel that. ..like education graduation... career advancement...marriage... pregnancy is also itself a very rewarding milestone. Now that i am a mother of 1 sweet girl and mother-to-be to one unborn little bean in my tummy..I am already feeling like the most fortunate woman on the planet. When i was younger, I always asked myself what is the meaning of life... I stopped asking myself that when i became a mother... from that very moment on.. the meaning becomes clear.

Will I do IVF again for a third child? I cannot rule that out yet. It is a possibility in the future. But lets not think about it now. Lets just have good thoughts about my ongoing pregnancy now.... good vibes to you little unborn child..... good vibes to you...

Worry Toad

My joy was quickily stained with fear.
I try to encourage myself to think only positive thoughts but deep inside.. i am so scared out of my wits right now ... remembering my previous miscarriage experience and worrying like crazy if the same shit will happen to me again. I guess that makes me a scarred woman.

Everything worries me, right now, my ceasarian scar is itching and i wonder why is that so.

Tomorrow morning, i am going to get my blood drawn again and have my doubling time checked. I need to get a grip and not fear so much.

I read somewhere that an indication of possible miscarry, other than sign of bleeding... is a slow doubling time. A low starting beta is common and does not indicate anything bad... I am trying to pacify myself real hard with these information. In fact, I consulted a gynae and he told me not to interpret too much of beta hcg level in such early stages.. and that one beta level test does not tell anything much.


Initially i was really hoping for twins.. but now , with my not very high beta levels of 231.. all i want is a healthy baby that i can give birth to.

That will be perfect to me... 1 healthy unborn child waiting to pop out of oven 9 months from now.

Beta Blood Test Result in

I am officially pregnant. :) BFP

The beta blood test confirms it.

My beta level is 231 on 18day past retreival.

My beta level is not super high but its not low enough to have my clinic worrying too.

I am sure 1 embryo implanted.

So my next appointment with the clinic is for my 6 week scan scheduled early november.

Since i am such a worry toad, I will definitely be going to get my blood checked again for consistent doubling time in the next few days. Really hope this pregnancy is viable and wont slip away from me.

Blood Test 's tomorrow!

i called up my ivf clinic to bring forward my beta blood test by one day. So tomorrow morning (16dp2dt) , i will be doing my blood test at kkivf and should know my beta level by 2pm the same day. I am praying for a high beta level.

After the blood test, i plan to take the shuttle bus to bugis junction and walk across to the national library to spend some time browsing the wide wide collections of books. I really enjoy our libraries for its great selection of books, updated facilities and nice cozy atmosphere.

There is this great website full of beta information, www.betabase.info .

And for detailed information on embryo development, its www.visembryo.com .

I have craving for certain dishes.. like xiao long bao with lots of vinegar dips, lor mee with lots of vinegar, kway chap with the sourish chilli... Yum yum. In fact i have been eating alot and i feel like a piggy now. The fact my digestive system seem to have gone a strike isnt helping much too.

Oh, i peed on another stick for the fun of it just now. The second line became visible immediately... :) I have a new found love with pee sticks.

So relieved but still in a daze

I kept wondering what i was going to blog about should this time be a bfn. So much so that i havent thought of what i am going to write if i get a bfp. I am very very happy to be an example of how rewards can come later in the game. (For my case, after a miscarriage and 2 previous bfn) So my dear readers who are trying multiple IVF times and to those who are facing an obstacle during your IVF process or those of you who been dealt with the bfn card... Please do not give up.... there is always hope and its aint over till the fat lady sings.

Now that I have 'graduated' from the hpt test. My next target is to get a good beta doubling time and look forward to my first six week's scan. I am very hopeful but also scared as now that i have graduated to a next stage.. there are new stages to aim for and new targets to reach in this nine months journey to birthing of the child.

Right now, I just want to immerse myself in this lovely ambience of bfp. I just want to enjoy every moment of it. I have waited for this day and i want to embrace it.

Hugs to every readers and every lovely soul that left comments on my blog. You are an additional strength to me to reach this stage.

I get to put a pregnancy ticker finally!

Finally...... BFP!

I woke up with a jolt at 4am this morning. I dreamt that all the pee sticks went negatives on me and I sat in the car crying my lungs out.



I sheepishly crawl out of bed and walked into the bathroom to use the last remaining digital pregnancy test (2 in a box). The first one that i used registered ' negative' a couple of days back.



I peed and waited and waited and 2 minutes later. What i saw made me pinched myself to be sure i am truly awake and not dreaming.......... This is what i see. " PREGNANT" , BFP!!!



YEAH!!!!! My long awaited BFP is here. Thank you God...thank you with all my heart.